Marriage Part 3


Part 3

We described previously in Part 2 of this series two types of marriage .

1. Contract
2. Covenant

I want to take a closer look at the distinctions between the two .

  • A covenant is everlasting ( meaning indefinite in time period )with no appointed end-time,
    with the mutual understanding  ” for as long as”  and  “until”   signifies there may be an end
    which is dependent upon both parties keeping , guarding , preserving their vows .
    The covenant then stands for  “as long as the relationship is maintained intact  …..
  • A solemn agreement or promise, sometimes confirmed by sacrifice or by sharing  ,
    e.g. – the exchange of rings , by which two or more parties commit themselves ,
    to the rights and responsibilities afforded by their relationship ,
    and their agreed upon , course of action,
    and to accept the serious consequences of breaking faith.

It is important to understand that covenants and contracts come with conditions .

This is an important fact that serves to define a covenant , and or , a contract.

Contracts, by their very definition, come with conditions
both to “create obligation”  and to “govern the outcome”  of the contract ,
and is  ” put in writing to bind the parties together ” .

The focus is based on the legal demands placed upon either and or both parties .

Covenants are based upon , and focus upon the  relationship
Covenants are made because the involved parties desire the relationship.

The pledge or vow is made in good faith and  upheld   in faithfulness .
That should not be mis-understood to mean a covenant doesn’t have conditions ,
but rather the focus in covenant is on the desire of the parties to remain in covenant .

I want to stay within the context of this series and focus on the marriage .
I will have another series following … that will deal with Covenants in general and in specific .

So , with that being said , let’s take a look in respect to marriage of adam ( male and female ) .
This we will do , in order for us , to lay a foundation ,
which will provide for us unshakeable ground ,
upon which , we can stand before YAHoVAH with confidence
and without condemnation .

Marriage is , in a very simple definition ,

  1. the state of two being joined into one ,
  2. the state of two being joined as one .

Let’s look a little closer …

  •   state
    1. the condition of a person, thing, etc, with regard to main attributes
    2. the structure, form, or constitution of something
    3. course or way of existence
    4. position in life
    5. domain or function of power
  •   two
    1. one and one
  • being
    1. becoming
    2. progressive present tense

      • expresses intention, expectation, supposition, or obligation
  • joined
    1. to come or bring together; connect
    2. to become a member
    3. to become a part of
    4. take a place in or with
    5. to unite

      • connect
      • link
      • couple
      • tie
  •   into  one
    1. transformation or change
  •   as   one
    1. in the role of  being
      • under the name of
      • in the character of 

We see now upon closer examination , there is much more to ” marriage ” than meets the eye .

My judgement of marriage , based upon the evidence presented so far , is as follows :

  • Marriage is an “everlasting” covenant
    • Everlasting in the bible sense of the Hebrew word Olam
      1. “long-lasting” is a fitting English translation for olam.
        • lasting as long as it lasts … “ever-lasting” = ”  long-lasting “.
          This is an indefinite period based on conditions of fulfillment .
  •  Marriage is in two dimensions  –  one in Heaven and one in Earth .

Marriage pattern on earth is the shadow of the Marriage reality in heaven .
The pattern always falls short of the reality .
For those who may have a problem accepting the pattern falling short of the reality ,
I suggest you take a picture of your automobile , and drive it to the market ….
Of course that’s absurd isn’t it  ?

Part 4 will discuss the reality of the marriage made in heaven , and a closer look at the definitions of marriage .

Shalom Chaverim





Marriage – Part 2

Part 2 .
Marriage Types
Contractual and Covenant Marriages
The differences
Contract:  I take  thee for me.
Covenant: I give  myself to thee.
Contract: You have to do
Covenant: How may we be
Contract: What do I get ?
Covenant: What can I give ?
Contract: I’ll meet you halfway.
Covenant: I’ll give you 100% plus.
Contract:  I have to
Covenant: I want to
A covenant marriage is intended by God to be a lifelong relationship exemplifying
  •  selfless love,
  • reconciliation,
  • sexual purity,
  • maturity
  • faithfulness
Covenants bear the fruit of a loving, faithful relationship.
The vows we exchange at our wedding reflect a relationship
set within the bonds of steadfast love and faithfulness.
The degree to which these words have value
is in direct proportion to the unselfish love
that dwells within our heart for the one
to whom we are repeating them.
Covenant partners take responsibility for their actions.
As partners in a covenant marriage relationship,
We are responsible for  our own  actions.
When we act selfishly irresponsible , going our own way ,
we are no longer in covenant , we are separated unto our self .
Covenants are based on freedom of choice.
Covenant marriages are not built on coercion, deceit, and domination .
Surrendering ourselves to another in love .
Surrender is freely given and grows from respect, not fear and manipulation.
We choose daily to love “as Christ loves the church.”
We must freely choose to love and honor covenant
in spite of  “feeling or not feeling”  like loving and honoring .
Covenants are rooted in actions based on choices, not feelings.
Our feelings are forever fluctuating.
Therefore to build a marriage on feelings is to build it on shifting sand,
which is unable to support the foundation of covenant marriage ,
rooted and grounded in love .
Covenant partners nurture , feed , and mature their relationship.
Covenant marriage will live and grow as we build up one another in love.
This takes place when we value our spouse more than ourselves.
As we experience the unselfish love of Jesus Christ, we are able to love  as He loves us
Covenant partners administer unselfish love, forgiveness, and reconciliation
while providing comfort and truth to their partner.
Covenants are based on commitments freely offered.
Covenant is built on selfless love, freely given and freely received.
As strange as it may sound ,
a covenant marriage is one in which the
“tie that binds the couple together “…
is a commitment freely offered with no strings attached.
YAHushua does have a marriage plan .
He desires to see our love grow and bear fruit.
The goal of a covenant marriage is not to merely enjoy each other’s company
nor is it to simply endure to the end.
The goal of a covenant marriage
is to glorify God in our relationship
and to exemplify our marriage in Christ to the world.
Covenant marriage by definition
must consist of two willing partners walking together in agreement .
Where there is the absence of this … there is in reality no covenant .
Those who have read this ,
and would like to continue the exploration ,
I give you fair warning .
Much of what is to follow may , or may not ,
fit in with certain dogma , or doctrine .
Proceed at your own risk with focused attention and an open heart .
John , the baptizer of YAHushua  , was beheaded
and his head carried into Herod’s court
for the matters that are now laid open before you .
I expect no less from Herod’s court today .
Shalom Chaverim = Peace upon you friends
Baruch Ha Mashiyach = Blessings of the Messiah
YAHushua = Jesus

Marriage – Part 1

Part 1 .   Marriage Purpose
The entire premise of marriage is revealed in the words of YAH ELOHIM in Genesis 2
Gen 2:18
And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
(KJV) – King James Version (KJV)
And Jehovah Elohim said, It is not good that Man should be alone; I will make him a helpmate, his like. 
(Darby) – Darby Translation (DBY)
Proper observance of the Divine intent with the correct aim is
* that a man and woman should love each other as their own being,
* respect each other more than our own self,
* be compassionate with each other,
* watch over each other , as a person would watch over one of his own limbs,
* she should love him, and he should love her , for she was taken from his side.
To quote Matthew Henry :
“The woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam;
not made out of his head to rule over him,
nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him,
but out of his side to be equal with him,
under his arm to be protected,
and near his heart to be beloved.
Our relationship as husband and wife is reflective of the relationship we construct with God
That is why the Creator commanded adam (male /female) in regards to each other ,
that we should never diminish the marital relations
which must include joy , intimacy , selflessness ,
and the basic provision of food , clothing , and shelter .
Anything short of this …. is sin .
Sin is , at the most primitive level , to simply  ” miss the mark “
The primary cause of  ” missing the mark ” is improper AIM
As “child abuse” is a crime against the holy nation,
“marital abuse” is also a crime against the holy nation
because it is criminal violation against YAH , family , and humanity .
Marital abuse is not only physical but verbal, emotional, and mental abuse
are in this category as well.
The dynamic , or power of marriage is companionship .
Physical relationship alone is animalistic.
Human beings need intimacy, an exclusive, warm, personal relationship of care and concern.
As there is a “oneness of flesh,” there must also be a “oneness of soul” and “oneness of spirit”
“I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me.
I love you for the part of me that you bring out.”
Man being by himself was incomplete because he did not have a companion.
YAH ELOHIM then gives the purpose of woman in stating
He would create for man a “help meet.”
The words “help meet” can be properly translated, “suitable helper.”
It literally means “a helper like man.”
The Hebrew word is “ezer”, and means “help, support, or helper.”
The Theological Word Book of the Old Testament states.
“While this word designates assistance, it is more frequently used in a concrete sense
to designate the assistant.”
(2) We can conclude that woman was created as man’s counterpart and his assistant.
Woman is man’s co-helper for life , as is man , woman’s co-helper for life .
Man without woman , or woman without man , cannot engender life .
        The word helper is not a demeaning term.
It is used in reference to God in Psalm 33:20, 70:5, 115:9.(3)
The term denotes purpose.
Woman was created to assist man in life and for life.
The Holy Spirit is our comforter , assistant , strengthener , advocate , etc .
Mankind without Holy Spirit cannot engender spirit life . That which is born of spirit is spirit .
Marriage is realized or given substance in three dimensions .
1. Spiritual  = spirit to spirit
2. Psychological  = mind to mind
3. Physiological  = body to body
Marriage in all three dimensions have certain common factors that define “marriage”
1. Consent
2. Agreement
3. Union
4. Intimacy
5. Bonding
6. Complementation
This is not meant to be an exhaustive compilation , but is at least a fundamental definition .